Episode 16: Random Thoughts from a Handsome Boss

Haven't written a blog in a minute but it's about time I make an update. Especially with the baseball winter meetings wrapping up, the first quarter of the NBA season passing us by, and the stretch run of the NFL season about to start this week.

NBA:

-The Utah Jazz has clearly been the suprise of the league so far. Well to everyone but me and a select few NBA analysts, I guess. I had them being in the top 6 of their conference. Right now, they defenitely look like they are at least that. Could this be Jerry Sloan's year to win an NBA championship? He's got all the pieces in place. A low post go to guy in Boozer, an extremely savvy point guard and a perimeter go to guy in Deron Williams, a very good #3 option in Okur, a defensive stopper in Kirilenko, and a very solid bench with good role players. Really scary team right now.

-The Western conference is CLEARLY better then the East. There are 10 teams in the West with at least a .500 record or better. Meanwhile, there are only 5 teams in the East that have a .500 record or better. YIKES. If Bud Selig was around, half of the Eastern conference would be contracted by now.

-The New York Knicks are currently 1 game out of first place (at 8-14 btw. Has there ever been a division more futile then the Atlantic? Someone from this division is going to get in the playoffs? WHAT?!?!). On top of that, Eddy Curry has finally been playing up to his potential (averaging 27 ppg, 10.5 rebounds per game, 1.2 steals, and 1.4 blocks per game in December), David Lee and the rest of the bench is playing out their god damn minds, and Stephon Marbury is still sulking in a corner somewhere.

What does that all mean? It means James Dolan will see improvement, won't fire Isiah, and I'll have to live with 2-3 more years of mediocrity. This is the life of a Knicks fan.

-If the playoffs started today, Minnesota would get the 8th spot in the West and would get trounced in the first round again for the 9th time in 10 years. Hey Mchale, show KG some pity and trade him to a contender!!!

-Orlando is another suprise in the league. Even more suprising is that they are 7-2 against the Western Conference. Dwight Howard MVP candidate?

-If the playoffs started today, Atlanta would have the 8th seed. If the season ended with Atlanta making the playoffs, pigs would start flying, hell would freeze over, and Israeli gov't officials would admit to framing the Muslims for 9/11. Seriously, when was the last time Atlanta made the playoffs?

-The New Jersey Nets are better then their record. It's obvious basketball isn't on the mind of the Nets right now. They need to get to the bottom of this closet homosexual in their ranks. Until then, they'll continue to suck. Oh yeah, and until they learn to play defense, they'll continue to suck.

-OH LOOK GUYS, AN "ALLEN IVERSON ABOUT TO BE TRADED" SITUATION, SUPRISE SUPRISE. WHAT? MANNY RAMIREZ WANTS TO BE TRADED TOO? I DIDNT SEE THAT COMING EITHER.

-If I had a vote, Melo is my first quarter MVP. He has been playing out of his mind so far and continuing his great play from the World Championships over the Summer. Yao Ming, Joe Johnson, Carlos Boozer, Lebron, Dwight Heezy, Dirk, Duncan, KG, and Nash round out the top 10.

MLB:

-Every pitcher on the market's value has become hyper inflated. #3 and #4 pitchers are making #2 starer money. #2 starters are making Ace money. Vicente Padilla is worth 11 million dollars per year for 4 years. Jason Schmidt is worth 16 Million a year for 3 years. I'm sure if I tested the open waters right now and told people I throw 85 mph left handed, I'd net about 5-6 mill a year for 4 years.

-Position players are also getting overpaid. Carlos Lee and Soriano are going to make 17 mill a year. JD Drew will be making 14 Mill per year. All of a sudden, Yankees only paying 20 mill per year for A-rod is a good deal. Beltran getting paid 17 mill a year is a bargain. Pujols being paid 15 mill a year is the steal of the century.

-Best deal of the offseason goes to the colorado rockies for signing Jeff Francis to a 13 mill deal for 4 years. A legit #2 starter imo, he could be commanding 10-12 mill per year on the open market. Instead the Rockies lock him up for cheap.

Best trade that helped both teams is the Deal b/w the phillies and White sox. The phillies didn't need Gavin Floyd for the future. They needed a pitcher now. Garcia will help the immediately. Meanwhile, the White sox have the time to coddle Floyd until he's ready considering the White sox have enough pitching.

NFL:

-As of right now, the San Diego Chargers are the favorites to win the Super Bowl. However, I still don't trust their secondary and I still won't trust any team coached by Marty Schottenheimer. He is the A-rod of Football coaching. Looks great in the regular season but is terrible in the postseason. However, can his team being too good overcome Marty's softbatchness?

-The second best team in the NFL is the Indianapolis Colts imo. However, Peyton Manning is to QBing as to Marty is to coaching. Has there ever been a season in the NFL where the top 2 teams in the league have known choke artists on the payroll?

-Chicago is the third best team in the league but their coach refuses to replace a completely ineffective QB. If Brian Griese is starting, this could be the best team in the NFL. I think Lovie Smith secretely hates Chicagoans.

-Whoever Jessica Simpson goes out with, that guy ends up looking like a million bucks after they break up (no homo). Nick Lachey had a huge year post-Jessica. John Mayer dissed the fuck outta Jessica and dropped a pretty good album. I'm waiting for Tony Romo to call it quits with her. He'll probably be hoisting a Super Bowl trophy in January if this happens.

-Do people find Vince Young being this good this fast as scary as I do? He possibly dismantled the Giants season by himself and engineered a 4th quarter to take down a top 4 team in the Colts. Goes to show you, scouts shouldn't give a lick about the Wonderlic (OMG MY BAD I HAD TO DO IT).

-AHAHAHAHHAHAHAH, Strahan could quite possibly out for the season. I'm way too bewildered to talk about the Giants right now.

-LOL. It's fitting that the Eagles are being led by a blatant homosexual. This just in, Jeff Garcia just signed with the New Jersey Nets.

Episode 15: BAAAAAAAAAAALLLLIIIIIN

Western Conference:
1. San Antonio Spurs
2. Phoenix Suns
3. Dallas Mavericks
4. Houston Rockets
5. LA Clippers
6. Utah Jazz
7. LA Lakers
8. Sacramemto Kings
9. Golden State Warriors
10. New Orleans Hornets
11. Denver Nuggets
12. Minnesota T-wolves
13. Seattle Supersonics
14. Memphis Grizzlies
15. Portland Traiblazers

Eastern Conference:
1. Cleveland Cavaliers
2. Chicago Bulls
3. New Jersey Nets
4. Detroit Pistons
5. Washington Wizards
6. Miami Heat
7. Indiana Pacers
8. Orlando Magic
9. Milwaukee Bucks
10. Charlotte Bobcats
11. Toronto Raptors
12. New York Knicks
13. Philedelphia 76ers
14. Atlanta Hawks
15. Boston Celtics

Atlantic Division:
1. New Jersey Nets

-The class of the division by far. Any team with Kidd, Carter, and Jefferson will contend. Marcus Williams will be able to give Kidd some breathers this year and keep him fresh for the playoffs. Still is one big man away from contending. Is also one huge injury or a domestic violence charge to Kidd away from the lottery. Will Jay-Z's pending album release be a distraction since he's promoting himself more then Nas and the Nets. DROP THE REDMAN ALBUM YOU FAGGOT ASS CAMEL!!

2. Toronto Raptors

-I think they are much improved. Bosh is going to take his game up to the next level. Man's all around game is nice. they also picked up solid players like Fred Jones, TJ Ford, Anthony Parker. Still a somewhat flawed team. Their biggest flaw being (que Stephen A) RASHO NESTEROVIC.

3. New York Knicks

-The Larry Brown situation last year was a mess. He hated everyone on the team. The whole team hated him. That alone could mean 6-8 more wins. They also are going to play at a higher tempo. One problem though. They still can't guard anyone for a lick and Stephon Marbury is still playing point guard. I'd say let's destroy this team but we don't have a lottery pick (or as i like to call it, a greg oden pick) to look forward to. All in All, this is a lost season.

4. Philedelphia 76ers

-Another flawed team. Webber is worthless. Only players worth a lick on this team is AI and Iguodala even though Carney can be good too. I can't see how this team can be any good. Especially with Allen Iverson dominating the ball the way he does. Imagine Iverson and Artest came out with a rap album together? I think David Stern would have a heart attack and then Don Corleone their asses after he recovered.

5. Boston Celtics

-Paul Pierce is the fucking truth. One of the more underrated ballplayers in the NBA. But waaaaaaaaaaaaay too many youngins on this squad. All this Rondo hype is sickening. People will get a reality check once he starts facing real NBA defenses that'll lock his ass down. Al Jefferson better start cashing in on his potential. LOL, looks like this team is in the Greg Oden hunt.

Southeast Division:
1. Washington Wizards

-Gilbert Arenas is going to kill everyone this year. Not only is he the craziest mamma jamma in the league, but he also is one of the best. He will lead the league in scoring this year, mark my words. They also have some solid pieces around them. They also play some solid defense. They need to rebound better though but they can defenitely contend in this conference.

2. Miami Heat

-I'm not sold on this team. They are too old around Wade. Shaq, Payton, and Alonzo are playing in wheelchairs and canes. No real scorers around Wade. However, since Wade and Riley have the NBA referees on the payroll, they'll make some noise in the playoffs.

3. Orlando Magic

-One of my sleeper teams. One injury to anyone in their starting lineup WILL hurt them. Dwight Howard is a beast though and Jameer Nelson is turning out to be a good PG. I can't believe i'm saying this but Darko can be a pretty good player alongside Dwight Heezy. Plus him and Hedo Turkogolu can speak in Kazakhstan, or whatever language they speak, to each other. On the court, that is a huge edge.

4. Charlotte Bobcats

-Another team i like as a sleeper squad. All this team really needed was a scorer and they got the best one in the draft in Adam Morrison. A nucleus of Felton, G. Wallace, Okafor, and Morison is a pretty good one to build around.

5. Atlanta Hawks

Since Speedy Claxton signed with them, they will endure the curse of Mike NJJ. Young squad with alot of talent. Marvin Williams injury already set them back. Josh Smith aka Ghetto Kirilenko is the new human highlight reel. He's a sportscenter top 10 waiting to happen in every game. You think Joe Johnson is kicking himself for not resigning with phoenix? Is being the man THAT important?!?!

Central Division
1. Cleveland Cavaliers

-So far my #1 ranked team in the conference. They have the best player in the nba. They play defense. They have a couple of rebounders. They have a couple of shooters. They have a #2 scorer in Larry Hughes. Right now, this team looks pretty good and they didnt even make a major move during the offseason. Now all we have to do is wait to see who wins between Buisness Lebron and Wise Lebron. I got my money on Buisness. He is way too cool.

2. Chicago Bulls

-They are an extremely good team. Excellent actually. Probably the best defensive team in the NBA. They have great defenders at every position. They are also extremely well coached by Scott Skiles. They are extremely athletic. However, I have three problems with them. 1) They don't have a go to scorer. 2) Ben Wallace is a liability at the end of close games. Not only can he not create offense for himself, he can't even hit a good clip of free throws. A double whammy when you don't have a go to scorer. 3) I've hated the Bulls since I was a kid.

3. Detroit Pistons

-A very good well rounded team. Losing Ben Wallace is going to be big though. Billups (even though a great PG) isn't a very good defensive player. Opposing PGs are going to get in the paint consistently against them. Ben used to counteract that. Now, it's buckets. At least they still have Rasheed and Rip. I can't root for anyteam that has Tayshaun Prince on it though. He just reeks of bitchiness. I CAN root for a team that has a Mohammed though. Props to Joe Dumars for that.

4. Indiana Pacers

-Well, you can count on one thing. They'll lead the league in players showing up in the Police blotter. Is Bender finally going to break out (and no, i don't mean Mindbender of PF Fame. He who already seems like broke out the looney bin)? I have a feeling Granger will. This guy is in the same mold of Kirilenko and Ghetto Kirilenko. These guys need a PG in a bad way. That's what they get for passing up on Marcus Williams. And think of the possibilities if Marcus Williams got drafted there. Not only do you have shootouts at strip clubs, beatdowns at rivals' arenas, but every beat writer for the Pacers would have to watch the laptops extremely carefully. They had the potential to be the Trailblazers East. Pretty dissappointed in Donnie Walsh and Larry Bird here.

5. Milwaukee Bucks

-Pretty good team. Front court of Bogut, Villanueva, and Bobby Simmons has loads of potential. Michael Redd's a great shooter. Mo Williams is a nice young point. They just miss out on the playoffs mainly because of the numbers game. I can easily see the Bucks sneaking in the playoffs.

Pacific Division
1. Phoenix Suns

-Went to the Western Conference Finals without Amare last year. Now they have Amare back. SCARY. Nash still can't play D but can still play the heck out of the PG position. Marion is still one of the more underrated ball players in basketball. Raja Bell can still clothesline Kobe during any given Laker game. He should've clotheslined Lamar Odom yesterday. Yikes. How many times do you think Gloss will say Leandro Barbosa's name wrong? I IMed him this morning and he called him "Barborosa". LOL, when did the Apprentice sign with the Phoenix Suns? Was that Jerry Colangelo's last move as executive of the Suns? Is Donald Trump now the new GM of the Phoenix Suns? Who's glare would win out? Kurt Thomas' or Donald Trump's? Ok Ok. Wait, one more. What's the odds on Gloss calling him "Barboro" or "Babel"? No, for real though. I'll stop. I promise.

2. LA Clippers

-Wasn't it just a couple years ago that everyone was making fun of this team? Now they are a top 10 team in all of basketball. We are counting down the days till Livingston is the point guard over Cassell. As great as Cassell is, Livingston is the future. Now that Elton Brand finally has an all star apperance after five 20 and 10 seasons, do you think he'll start to slack off? Doubt it. No real glaring weakness other then they don't have that much experience.

3. LA Lakers

-Played suprisingly well without Kobe yesterday. I hope Kobe looks at this and starts spreading the ball around. They added a couple of nice players in radmanovic and Farmar. Plus Bynum looks much improved. The biggest key here is whether Kobe trusts his teammates enough.

4. Sacramento Kings

-Artest thinks this team can win a championship? A nucleus of Artest, Bibby, and Brad Miller can contend. But what about the pieces around them? Kevin Martin has a chance to break out and score alot. And i fully endorce any Muslim player nicknamed Reefer. All day every day.

5. Golden State Warriors

-After years of hype, can they finally make the playoffs this year? is RUN TMC back in the form of RUN BRD (Baron, Richardson, Dunleavy)? Is going to be an extremely explosive team but will they play enough defense? Will Baron play a full season? Will Dunleavy stop making goofy faces while he's playing? Seriously. He looks like he has a touch of down.

Northwest Division
1. Utah Jazz

-Their season hinges on Kirilenko staying healthy. Seriously scary team right here. They have some good white players on this team. Lets check them off. Kirilenko, check. Mehmut Okur. Check. Matt Harpring. Check. Greg Ostertag. Check. Carlos Boozer. Check. Deron Williams is going to kill shit this year. When they drafted Ronnie Brewer (who can play some critical minutes for the Jazz this year), I was perplexed. I was like "Sloan does realize that Brewer is black, right?"

2. Denver Nuggets

-Carmelo and that's it. Honestly, look at this team and tell me this is a playoff team. George Karl is a good coach but not that good. Do you think you'll see Melo in the paper for domestic violence this year? Or at least go insane during a game? Think about it. After all the losses mount up, he'll go home to LaLa who will probably talk non stop at 50 words per second. I defenitely don't want to be Melo.

btw, i don't condone beating women of any type. I'd make sweet love to LaLa but with duct tape over her mouth. That'd make fellatio difficult but i'll improvise.

3. Minnesota T-wolves

-This team is talented but look at the roster. McHale must've went to the Bob Whitsit or Isiah Thomas school of GMing. Will Garnett get traded at the trade deadline this year? I got money on it. Possible destinations right now? Chicago and New Jersey.

4. Seattle Supersonics

-Robert Swift going down for the year was the best thing to ever happen to this team. Now Nick Collison can play some minutes. He can play. If Wilcox can give the sonics some muscle to go along with Ray Ray and Rashard's shooting, this could be a dangerous team. Don't bank on it though.

5. Portland Trailblazers

-LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL. At least Blazer fans can look forward to watching Brandon Roy and LaMarcus Aldridge play. Wait? Aldridge is hurt and out indefenitely? LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL

Southwest Division
1. San Antonio Spurs

-IMO, the best team in basketball. They play defense. They rebound. They can shoot. They can pass. They can play at any tempo even though they prefer to play with a deliberate half court style. They have a go to player and a #2 scorer. Solid point guard play. Depth. Duncan is back minus the planar fascitits. Could be looking at another MVP year. Only flaw is that they are old at a few key spots.

2. Dallas Mavericks

-Dirk is a great player. He's lacking a little bit on defense but he's a great player. There's just one thing that bothered me last year. During last year's finals, he didn't impose his will on any of the last 4 games. Not at all. Sure the refs didn't give him love like Wade did but at some point during any of those games, Dirk's gotta say "Gimme the ball and get outta my way." There's no way James Posey was bothering him that much where he couldn't do that. It's like Chris Rock in a Greatest All around Comedian of All Time debate. Sure he killed it during SNL. Sure he killed it on the stand up circuit. But unlike Pryor and Eddie, he never did his thing in movies.

3. Houston Rockets

-Yao and Tracy. The potential is there. They just have to connect on some Baby and Lil Wayne shit. Yao just gotta tell Tracy "WTF, nigga. You acting like you lost your father." Then Tracy realizes at that point, he never lost a father. Plus they gotta stay healthy. and not kiss each other on some cash money/Magic Johnson and Isiah type thing. Other then that, they look dangerous.

4. New Orleans Hornets

-Is Chris Paul already the best PG in the NBA? Wow, he's awful close. Now he has Peja and a plethora of big men to pass to. However, I don't think it's their time yet. The West is too stacked and they are too young. One more year. Did you do a double take when you read the fact I used "plethora"? I swear I didn't look in a dictionary or thesaurus. That word IS actually in my vocabulary. Promise.

5. Memphis Grizzlies

-LOL, you gotta love this division. You got names like Yao, Pau, and Bonzi. and Gay. LOL. oh yeah. BTW, Memphis sucks and will continue to suck until Gasol comes back. By that time, it'll be too late.

MVP:
1. Lebron James
2. Tim Duncan
3. Gilbert Arenas
4. Dwyane Wade
5. Kobe Bryant

Defensive Player of the Year:
1. Andrei Kirilenko
2. Ben Wallace
3. Josh Smith
4. Ron Artest
5. Bruce Bowen

Rookie of the Year:
1. Adam Morrison
2. Brandon Roye
3. Randy Foye

Coach of the Year:
1. Jerry Sloan
2. Lawrence Frank
3. Scott Skiles
4. Eddie Jordan
5. Gregg Popovich

All NBA First Team:
G- Gilbert Arenas
G- Kobe Bryant
F- Lebron James
F- Tim Duncan
C- Yao Ming

NBA Championship Prediction:

San Antonio Spurs over the New Jersey Nets or Chicago Bulls. I'm leaning towards the Nets right now. Yeah, I know. I have the Cavs as the #1 ranked team in the conference. Right now, that is my preseason rankings of each team. The Cavs could finish with the #1 seed in the East and I don't think they'll go to the finals. It's not Lebron's time yet. I'm sure the NBA is hopeing for it. That'd be a ratings coupe. Also, Garnett getting traded or other moves or injuries can defenitely change the landscape of the Eastern Conference. If the Chicago Bulls get Garnett, they will look downright scary. So can the Nets if they acquire KG. As of right now, I have the Spurs over the Nets.

Episode 14: Destroy and Rebuild

It's been a long time.......since i left you..........with another dope blog to step to.

Well, in today's blog, the topic will be both the New York Yankees and the New York Mets. Both teams ended their seasons on dissappointing notes. Yankees were huge favorites to beat the Tigers only to get dismantled and the Mets being the odds on favorite by Las Vegas to win the world Series at midseason only to watch the Cardinals edge them out in a game 7. If I was a GM of either team, what would Gregg Popa do?

New York Yankees

1. Get some starting pitching

Pitching wins championships. It was the main reason why the yankees won all those world series in the mid 90's. It's the reason why alot of these scrub teams that i don't really care about since the turn of the century are winning World Series rings. Well, it's time that the Yankees go back to their meal ticket. Looking at the Yankees rotation right now, it consists of Chien Ming Wang, Moose, Randy "Never doing Dandy" Johnson, Jaret "I'm never feeling" Wright, and Carl Pavano. Well, the yankees hold an option on wright where we can buy him out at 5 mill. I buy him out immediately and tell him not to let the door hit him on the way out but secretly pray for it. Randy Johnson just had back surgery. I would ask him to retire. The man is done. I'm sure he wants to go after 300 but at what cost? His legacy is being tarnished. His slider hangs. His fastball doesn't have the same velocity. People could tolerate his grumpiness when he was good but now he sucks. Retire, nigga. Carl Pavano hasn't pitched for the yankees in 2 years and will continue to not pitch for them. Alyssa Milano dumped him a couple years ago and now the Yankees are looking for every possible way to dump him too. It reminds me of the Seinfeld episode where George's girlfriend wants to dump him but he goes out of his way to avoid her so she never gets that chance. Fuck Carl Costanza Pavano. Fuck Him.

So who fills their spots? Easy. Sign Andy Pettitte. He's a free agent, he's a lefty, he's had great postseason sucess, and he's familiar with the the Yankee organization. He finished the season strong last year with a 2.80 ERA in the second half. He's not too old at 34. Plus he loves Torre and Torre loves him. He can easily be the 4th starter in the Yankee rotation. Who else would I get? I'd outbid everyone for the rights to negotiate with Daisuke Matsuzaka. Who's that? The Japanese pitcher who mowed down everyone in the WBC and pitched great in the Japanese majors last year (17-5, 2.13 ERA, 0.92 WHIP, 200 K, 186.3 IP). He could come in and be the #2 starter for the Yanks. As for my fifth starter, I'd dig deep into the Yankee minors and pull out Phil Hughes, the uber prospect. The man has been mowing down every hitter at every level he's been at so far. Its about time he starts doing it at the major league level. So at the end of my spending spree, my starting rotation looks like this.

1. Wang
2. Matsuzaka
3. Moose
4. Pettitte
5. Hughes

A defenite improvement over last year.

2. Don't trade A-rod

WHAT?!?!?! Yeah, I know every Yankee fan wants to trade A-rod. But why? He's a top 2 player in all of baseball. And if you trade him, the Yankee lineup would be overwhelmingly lefty. A good lefty starter would neutralize them. Sooner or later, A-rod will hit in the playoffs. I'm convinced of this. He's too good not to. At least, I hope he is. He is, right???? RIGHT?!?!?!?

No way I would trade him unless I got an ace starting pitcher and a solid prospect to go along with it. Seems like too much? Well, no it's not consider A-rod is in the prime of his career and if he retired now, he'd still be a first ballot Hall of Famer.

3. Trade Sheffield for a relief pitcher

I'm tired of this fagnut. He complains about every little thing that happens. Plus, he badmouths everyone. If he didn't outweigh me by 100 pounds, I'd challenge him to a fight. If I were GM, I trade him to a team that can hopefully give me some middle relief. See if I can get Scott Shields from Anaheim (who is interested in Sheffield) for Sheff. If not, try to get a decent prospect and look for relief pitching in free agency.

and really, that is all the Yankees need. The Yanks don't have any glaring holes anywhere else. The lineup is still filled with all stars. They still have the greatest closer in baseball history. If they do everything I wrote about here, they should be back in the World Series with no problems.

New York Mets

1. Find a good hitting corner Outfielder, preferrably right handed hitting

Cliff Floyd is as good as gone. He was rumored to be gone since the beginning of the season. So who do you replace him with? Lastings Milledge? The rumor mill is buzzing with talk that they will use him as a chip to trade for someone so he doesn't seem to be a viable option. So who else is out there? Alfonso Soriano? Well, he's the obvious choice. Let's run down the reasons why.

1. He's hispanic. We all know how much Minaya loves hispanics. It's actually, quite disturbing how much he loves them. I better stop before this blog gets homophobic. WHAT?!?!? IT ALREADY IS?!?!?!

2. Willie Randolph loves him. In fact, when they were both on the Yankees, Soriano credited Randolph with helping his transition to second base (soriano was originally a SS prospect).

3. He's already a proven commodity in NY. He's shown up and done things in the playoffs as a Yankee.

4. He has an outstanding power and speed combination.

However, I don't think the Mets will land Soriano. I don't think they are as big on him as they were in the beginning of the season. He's starting to gain a reputation of being sensitive. Will he mesh well in the Mets "rah rah" locker room where LoDuca is the leader and Reyes cracks jokes constantly? Maybe but i think Minaya has his eyes on another hispanic outfielder. His name is Carlos Lee. Stick him in the middle of that Mets order at a more cost friendly price compared to Soriano, the Mets lineup becomes more formidable. This would be the smart move if I'm the Mets GM.

2. Let's get a second baseman

You cannot bank on 56 year old Jose Valentin to have another season like he had last year. However, if you look at the free agent market, it's slim pickings. The best second basemen are Ray Durham and Ronny Belliard. YUCK. So would I try to grab one of them?

2 words.

HELL FUCKING NO

I know. That was three words. Anyways, you try to trade for another second baseman. Who's out there? Ask the LA Dodgers if they are open to trading either Jeff Kent or ,prefferably, Julio Lugo. Or you can go to Plan B and ask the Tamba Bay Devil Rays if they are willing to deal Jorge Cantu. Offer one of the many promising Mets starters in the minors, and we might have a deal with either the Dodgers or Devil Rays. Another good thing about the possibility of getting Lugo or Cantu is the fact that they are both hispanic. I think we went over how much Minaya loves Hispanics.

3. Let's get a Starting Pitcher

After Pedro and El Duque went down before the playoffs, the Mets were in big trouble and their feared lineup was expected to carry them to the World Series. Then something weird happened. Their hitters stopped hitting and their scrub pitchers threw gems. Thing is, can the Metropolitans rely on John Maine or Oliver Perez to do what they did in the postseason over a 162 game season? Going into next season, the Mets don't have anyone they can rely on to start baseball games. Their two supposed aces of Pedro and Glavine have the ability to burn them. Pedro can burn them through the sheer fact that there could be a good chance that he'll never be a great pitcher ever again after surgery. Glavine can burn them by simply not picking up the mutual option that both the Mets and him have. There are grumblings that Glavine wants to go back to Atlanta to finish up his career.

So what do I do about the starting staff? Lets start off by convincing Glavine that he needs to stay here. Then you need to start the chase after Barry Zito. Zito had a good year in the AL. Imagine what he could do in the NL. That 3.83 ERA he posted in the AL can easily be a 3.33 ERA pitching in a pitcher's park like Shea against NL hitters and facing pitchers every 9 hitters. I could go after Matsuzaka but I fully expect the Yankees to blow everyone (no homo) out the water when it comes to bidding for the right to negotiate with him. Now you need another starter. How about someone that just helped eliminate you? Jeff Suppan is a free agent. More then likely though, the Cards will resign him. There are also solid starters like Greg Maddux and Gil Meche available. I'd fill out my final two spots in the rotation with Oliver Perez and John Maine. My five man rotation would be glavine, zito, Meche/Maddux, Perez and Maine until July when Pedro comes back.

Those moves should be good enough to get the Mets into the World Series. Their lineup is stacked and their bullpen is great. So with a bit of tinkering, they should be just as good or better. However the Mets should watch out because the Braves will retool as well and the upstart Marlins will have a full year under their belt. It will be one crazy year in the NL East.

Episode 13: Popa's Pigskin Preview

Every year I make NFL predictions and every year, i'm totally off. This year shouldn't be any different.

AFC WEST:
1. San Diego Chargers
2. Denver Broncos
3. Kansas City Chiefs
4. Oakland Raiders

The chargers take this division with a ridiculous front seven and arguably the best player in the league. Sure they have Phillip Rivers at QB but 2 of the other 3 teams in this division have Jake Plummer and Aaron Brooks at the helm. I like the Broncos but I have them just missing the playoffs. Great defense but Jake Plummer is shaky especially after the meltdown in the playoffs and now he has Jay Cutler looking over his shoulder. I'm also not a big fan of this RB merry go round they have going there. KC has the tools but their coach is Herman Edwards. He's going to make Marty Schottenheimer look like a genius in this division. Plus what was once the best Offensive line in the league is now rebuilt. Not a good sign for LJ. Only thing I have to say about the Raiders is Aaron Brooks. It's also nice to see a player named Huff in the league.

AFC South:
1. Indianapolis Colts
2. Jacksonville Jaguars
3. Houston Texans
4. Tennessee Titans

Colts are the class of the division here. The defense is still stout and they still have peyton (which means he's bound to choke in the playoffs at one point). I thought Jacksonville was ahead of schedule last year. I think they'll just miss out on the playoffs this year. First bold prediction here is that Garrard might take over for Leftwich at one point this year. I would've picked the Texans as a darkhorse sleeper if Davis didn't have grandma ankles in here knees. BOB reference there. The Titans are a mess except at QB where they are probably the deepest team in the league. Newsflash guys, you can use some of the money y'all spend at QB on other positions! Keith Bulluck is crying behind an elvis statue somewhere.

AFC North:
1. Baltimore Ravens
2. Cincinatti Bengals*
3. Pittsburgh Steelers
4. Cleveland Browns

Call me crazy but I like the Ravens alot. Extremely balanced all around. If Mcnair doesn't get hurt, this team can get a bye in the playoffs. Big If though. Bengals offense is the best in the league. I'm still not sold on their defense. I know what you're thinking. Every year the steelers lose someone and they still make the playoffs. However the division is alot tougher this year then last year and the turnover might be too much. I feel bad for the Browns but they are going in the right direction. They have some type of curse though. Everytime they acquire a big time player, he goes down early in the season.

AFC East:
1. New England Patriots
2. Miami Dolphins*
3. Buffalo Bills
4. NY Jets

Tough time picking b/w the pats and dolphins. Went with the Patriots for now because of Brady. NE has the healthier QB as of now. The Branch situation doesn't scare me that much. They still have a solid defense even though it's not as strong as yester years. The biggest hindrance to a super bowl run is (believe it or not and i can't believe i'm saying this) is losing their kicker. Dolphins offense looks like it's ready to do big things and their defense is still solid. It all depends on whether you see Pro Bowl Daunte or Multiple Turnover Culpepper. Bills might be a sleeper team but their QB situation is really iffy. Can you trust any QB named JP? Didn't think so. The Jets suck. honestly. I can't see how they can muster more then 3 wins.

NFC West:
1. Seattle Seahawks
2. Arizona Cardinals
3. St. Louis Rams
4. San Francisco 49ers

This division will be tougher then you think. Seattle will still probably run through this division but the Rams and Cardinals are improved imo. I like Seattle's chances but Alexander will succumb to the Madden Curse. It never fails. Prepare to die (if only for this season), Mr. Alexander. They did improve their defense which looks very scary on paper. The Cardinals have too much offense and have a defense with a lot of potential. Next year, this might be a team to worry about. The Rams' newfound commitment to the running game will make them better off. Don't have to worry about Martz' gameplans anymore with probably 4 running plays a game. LOL. 49ers need a couple more drafts before they can start competing imo. Vernon Davis will be a beast though.

NFC North:
1. Chicago Bears
2. Minnesota Vikings
3. Detroit Lions
4. Green Bay Packers

I really had a tough time picking a division winner here. Mainly because I think Minnesota is a really strong team that CAN win the division here. They'll at least push for a playoff spot. The Bears defense is too strong though. Plus I think Muhsin Muhammad will be in for a big year too. Especially now that he has a QB that isn't Kyle Orton throwing to him. Minnesota is a very good team. Might have the best offensive line in the NFL. Looks like Chester Taylor might have a breakout year. Could be this year's LJ. Lions could be a solid team. I'm convinced Martz can't be a head coach....just an offensive Coordinator. Marinelli will make sure Martz sprinkles in some runs into the gameplan. Martz might make Roy Williams look extremely good this year though. Packers o-line looks a mess as does their secondary. Who on the Packers is going to generate a pass rush? I can only think of 2 or 3 people off the top of my head. AJ Hawk and Barnett are going to rack up 200 tackles each considering how long they'll both be on the field.

NFC South:
1. Atlanta Falcons
2. Carolina Panthers*
3. Tampa Bay Bucs
4. New Orleans Saints

In my suprise pick of the year, I'm picking the Falcons to win the division over the Panthers. I really like the way the defense looks for the Falcons. That pass rush is going to be sick. I think Vick will play better. He just needs his receivers to hold on to the ball. He'll have a lot of help on the ground with Dunn and Norwood though. I like the Panthers alot. However they always seem to get some type of injury. Disgusting. They probably will win this division if they stay somewhat healthy. D'angelo will be the truth when Deshaun Foster goes down. Tampa Bay just looks old, especially on defense. They need to re build around simms and Cadillac. Saints defense is terrible. But at least they have Jesus in cleats!!!!

NFC East:
1. New York Giants
2. Philedelphia Eagles*
3. Dallas Cowboys
4. Washington Redskins

The Giants are loaded. It all depends on whether Coughlin can put it together and whether Eli is really lined up to take the leap. Usually, young QBs take the leap in their third year. With the weapons surrounding Manning this year, don't be suprised if it does happen. Giants pass rush should be insane and will help protect a suspect secondary. Mcnabb makes a MVP push and carrys the Eagles on his back. I still think the defense is a little suspect even though I'm sure Jim Johnson will help cover up the holes as best he can. I'm really not sold on their corners. I don't know what to think of the cowboys. They can win this division or finish in last. It all depends on if Owens disruptive or not. It seems like Owens was pushed on to Parcells' lap and he really didn't want him. I don't think the offense is as good as advertised. The defense is however. My buddy BOB keeps telling me Brunell is for real. I don't see it. I see a QB that isn't as mobile as he used to be, who's arm is not as strong as used to be, and overall just looks long in the tooth. BOB will bring up the stats and he feels stats don't lie. He is half right....Stats can be misleading. They'll be a solid team. probably finish around 7-9 or 8-8. They finish last by default unfortunately. In another division, they might win the division or make the playoffs through the wild card.

Award Winners:

MVP: Ladainian Tomilson

AFC Offensive Player of the Year: Ladanian Tomilson

NFC Offensive Player of the Year: Eli Manning

Defensive Player of the Year: Ed Reed

NFL Offensive Rookie of the Year: Jesus in Cleats

NFL Defensive Rookie of the Year: AJ Hawk

Popa's Super Bowl Pick:
Carolina Panthers over the Indianapolis Colts

WHAT?!?!? I didn't even pick the panthers as my divisional winner?!?! I feel by the time the stretch run hits, they'll be hitting on all cylinders if they don't get hit by the injury bug. That's a big "if".

Fantasy Futbol HOLLA!

I know, I know. It's been a while since I wrote you. Can you blame me? Nothing really great in sports right now. I haven't seen a great movie in a while. And I only get hit on by underage chicks (some of my readers would probably think that is a good thing). However, there is one thing I can write about. You can smell it in the air, can't you? Yes, football is on its way. With all this talk of training camps, Terrell Owens, and bulletproof vests, another phenomenon has sinked it's claws into American culture that is tied into the football season. FANTASY FOOTBALL. That's right, with preseason games about to start soon, fantasy football drafts are right around the corner. WHO BETTER THEn BIG POPPA TO DISH OUT FANTASY FOOTBALL RANKINGS AND INFO TO THE NEEDY?!?! Brandon Funston? Cracka plz. Eric Karrabell? He's just not gully enough to tell it how it is. plus he works for the man. On to the show!

Quarterbacks:

1. Peyton Manning
Pros- He's Peyton fucking Manning. Dude's a fantasy machine. Is averaging 35 TD passes a year and 10 INTs a year during the past 3 years. Has thrown for at least 3,700 yards for every year of his career. Has thrown 26 TD passes every year of his career. Plus, with no Edge, there's a chance that the Colts will actually throw more. Has weapons galore.

Cons- Losing Edge is a double edged sword for Peyton's fantasy owners. Sure he'll probably throw more now but don't you think opposing defenses know that? He'll see alot of 2 safeties deep everytime he drops back. Losing James also means his bread and butter (playaction pass) will lose some of it's Edge (pun intended). Peyton better pray addai and rhodes can pick up the slack.

2. Tom Brady
Pros- Throws to everyone and rarely makes a mistake. Has thrown at least 20 TD passes every year since 2002. Threw for 4000 yards last year. Never has thrown more then 15 INTs in his career. Has 2 good running backs that'll keep defenses honest. Safest pick.

Cons- Deion Branch is holding out. Never a good thing to see your #1 receiver holding out. Maroney/Dillon combo will mean less Brady pass attempts. He's a golden boy faggot that takes magazine pictures with his dogs. You usually want your fantasy QB to be more gully then that.

3. Carson Palmer
Pros- Has as much upside as Peyton Manning. Has all the tools and lots of weapons. Threw 32 TD passes last year to lead the league.

Cons- That knee could hold him back. Plus the bengals look like they might run the ball more this year. That would put a hit to Palmer's fantasy value.

3. Matt Hasslebeck
Pros- One of the more efficient QBs last year. Only threw 9 INTs. Has thrown at least 20 tds every year in the past 3 years. Has some solid weapons at his disposal. Because everyone in his division sucks, he faces cupcake defenses.

Cons- He has a severely receding hairline that would give Hulk Hogan a run for his money. All his WRs drop balls. no homo. Nate burleson happens to be a member of his WR core. Lost a huge member of the Offensive line in Hutchinson.

4. Daunte Culpepper
Pros- Has talent and alot of weapons. Let's count them off. Chambers. Booker. Wes Walker. Derek Hagan. Randy McMichael. Ronnie Brown. He is also a rushing threat. Plus unlike Vick, he can actually throw the ball.

Cons- He also has a bum knee and a history of injuries. Plus you have to get over the fact that he fumbles the football more then George W. Bush does with words during his speeches.

5. Eli Manning
Pros- He's a Manning. He also has a multitude of weapons. This could be the year he puts it all together. Unlike Palmer or Culpepper ahead of him, has no injury history.

Cons- Might help you win the important fantasy category of "drunken pictures taken with underage females". You are banking on potential here. He threw 17 INTs last year. Looks like a fucking goofball. His father's name is Archie.

6. Donovan Mcnabb
Pros- He can throw and pass equally well. Has a history of doing it all by himself.

Cons- Has missed large chunks of a season in 2 of the past 4 seasons due to injury. If your grandmother was signed to join their receiving core, it would be considered an upgrade.

7. Marc Bulger
Pros- Has a history of huge passing numbers. WR core looks dangerous.

Cons- Injury History. Has lost one of the best offensive minds in football in Mike Martz.

8. Jake Delhomme
Pros- Is lucky enough to be able to throw to Steve Smith. He also has keyshawn too.

Cons- He looks like taylor hicks in pads.

9. Kurt Warner
Pros- former MVP with weapons galore in arizona.

Cons- Injury history, fumbling problems, and his wife looks tougher then he does.

10. Drew Bledsoe
Pros- Terrell Owens is on his team.

Cons- Terrell Owens is on his team.

Best of the Rest:
11. Trent Green- Good history but now plays in a Herman Edwards offense.
12. Jake Plummer- he was good last year but he's fucking jake plummer.
13. Drew brees- Good QB that's coming off shoulder surgery.
14. Steve McNair- Good QB with weapons around him in Baltimore. Injury history so might have to handcuff with boller.
15. Michael Vick- Runningback playing QB. He throws like a RB too.
16. Byron Leftwich- Retirement of Jimmy Smith hurts.
17. Brett Favre- Could throw more INTs then TD passes.
18. Aaron Brooks- Could be helped by the fact that Randy Moss is on his team.
19. Ben Roflzberger- Just pray he puts on his helmet during football games.
20. David Carr- Pray that his offensive line can keep him off his ass cause he has the talent and weapons.

Running backs:

1. Larry Johnson
Pros- Was on fire at the end of last year. Finished last year with 21 total TDs and over 2000 yards total offense. Herman Edwards is the type of coach that will run the ball on third and 8 so you know LJ will get alot of carries. Has one of the best Offensive lines in the NFL blocking for him.

Cons- Willie Roaf retired. With the Chiefs weak receivers coupled with Herman Edwards unimaginative playcalling, LJ could see alot of 8 man fronts.

2. LaDainian Tomilson
Pros- Does it all. Runs the ball effective and catches the ball out of the backfield. Scored 20 TDs last year. With Phillip Rivers at the helm, you can expect a steady dosage of Tomilson.

Cons- Is only the second best player of all time with the same initials. Fact that Rivers is at the helm could mean that he'll see alot of 8 man fronts. Has touched teh ball alot in the past 4 years....he could break down sooner then expected.

3. Shaun Alexander
Pros- Remarkably consistent. Has scored 20 TDs in each of the past two years, including the record last year. Owns 2 of the top 20 rushing seasons of all time. Durable.

Cons- Lost huge piece of o-line in hutchinson. Is on the Madden cover this year. All players who've had legendary years have really down years the next year. Not much of a receiver at all.

4. Clinton Portis
Pros- Great talent with immense speed. New offensive coordinator (al Saunders) has a history of getting the best out of his RBs. Gibbs likes to run the ball alot.

Cons- Plays in an extremely tough division when it comes to defenses. Treats everyday like it's holloween. Wouldn't be suprised if there's a scandal involving him, a couple hoggettes, and a motel room.

5. Tiki Barber
Pros- He is Tomilson lite. Runs well and catches well. Lead league in total yards from scrimmage last year. scored at least 11 tds in each of last 2 years. In a juggernaut of an offense.

Cons- Has fumbling history even the he's been good the past 2 years. He is on the wrong side of 30. Brandon Jacobs could vulture some TDs away from him.

Best of the Rest:
6. Edge- Does everything well and now plays in a great offense in arizona.
7. Rudi Johnson- Could be a breakout year this year for Rudi.
8. Ronnie Brown- a player very similar to Edge in style.
9. Lamont jordan- Art Shell will run the ball more.
10. Steven Jackson- Needs to be more consistent but has alot of potential.
11. Cadillac- Injury bug hit him during his rookie season.
12. Domanick Davis- very consistent RB.
13. Kevin Jones- pray that Martz doesn't neglect him like he did with Faulk sometimes.
14. Brian Westbrook- would be a ranked higher if he was more durable and got more touches.
15. Willis Mcgahee- great RB in a horrible situation.
16. Julius Jones- handcuff with marion barber III.
17. Warrick Dunn- lots of yards, not alot of scores.
18. Chester Taylor- could have a breakout year with a huge o-line blocking for him.
19. Corey dillon- Has come to training camp looking downright sexy.
20. Reggie Bush- He will touch the ball alot. running, catching, or kick and punt returns.

Wide Receivers:

1. Steve Smith
Pros- He either lead the league or tied the league lead in receptions, receiving yards, and TD catches. Keyshawn should take some of the pressure of him. He'll also get the ball alot on end arounds and on punt returns.

Cons- Smallish WR isn't exactly a redzone threat. He did miss a whole year 2 years ago so he does have an injury history. Plays in a balanced offense.

2. Terrell Owens
Pros- Probably the biggest endzone threat out of all the WRs. Will see majority of the balls thrown his way in the passing attack.

Cons- He can self destruct at anytime. Bill Parcells is always a run first head coach. Drew Bledsoe is his QB.

3. Chad Johnson
Pros- Redzone threat. Good to catch about 90+ balls. Has an excellent QB throwing to him.

Cons- Even though Carson Palmer is great, he is injured. This could lead to the bengals running the ball more in the beginning of the season to protect palmer more.

4. Tory Holt
Pros- Tory Big Game Holt is clearly the best WR in his unit. Will see the majority of the balls thrown his way. Good for at least 90-100 catches. Always consistent.

Cons- Missed 2 games last year due to injury for the first time in his career. Rams plan to run more. Since he is clearly the best WR on the team, defenses will pay alot of attention to him.

5. Larry Fitzgerald
Pros- Big WR that is an endzone threat. Plays in a pass happy system. Tied for the league lead in receptions last year. Defenses can't key on him. Since the defense isn't very good, team will be playing from behind alot.....that means more passing.

Cons- Has to share the ball with Anquan Boldin.

6. Randy Moss
Pros- Most talented WR in the game. Should be good for 10 TDs. Can score from anywhere in the field.

Cons- Doesn't always play hard. Whizzinator can fall out of his uniform at any moment.

7. Marvin Harrison
Pros- Peyton's favorite WR. Mr. Consistent. Scored 12 TDs last year. Plays in a pass happy offense that might pass even more this year.

Cons- Is a little long in the tooth. Stats wise, he has been on the decline. Reggie Wayne might steal some catches from him.

Best of the Rest:
8. Anquan Boldin- Same advantages as Fitzgerald except not as much of a redzone threat and more of an injury concern.
9. Chris Chambers- Duante to Chambers combo could be something to look out for this season. Big redzone threat.
10. Hines Ward- Could be the best all around WR in the NFL. Unfortunately, plays in a run first offense.
11. Darrell Jackson- Could be higher on this list if he didn't drop the ball so much. Plus Alexander gets all the touches in the redzone.
12. Santana Moss- Played like a top 10 WR last year and could be even better with a better supporting cast this year since the defense will key on him less. Could also mean less looks.
13. Plaxico Burress- Eli's security blanket and a huge redzone threat with his size.
14. Roy Williams- Could be one of two things. A breakout year or another dissappointing season.
15. Donald Driver- The packers could be trailing alot. That means Driver will be catching alot of passes.
16. Javon Walker- Could be a huge suprise coming off injury.
17. Deion Branch- Brady's favorite option is hindered by the fact QB spreads it around.
18. Joey Galloway- Great speed WR that is held back because of chris simms. Getting old.
19. Derrick Mason- McNair and Mason are reunited. Chemistry is a big thing with WRs and QBs.
20. Andre Johnson- Could breakout. Again. O-line needs to hold up though.

Tight Ends:

1. Antonio Gates
Pros- Always an endzone threat. Always good for at least 10 TDs. Is the primary receiver in the Chargers offense.

Cons- Is playing with a first year QB. Chargers expect to run the ball more this year.

2. Tony Gonzalez
Pros- Primary receiver in the Chiefs offense. Good for 70 catches.

Cons- Herman Edwards unimaginative playcalling so Chiefs will probably run the ball more then last year. LJ is getting all the touches in the redzone.

3. Jeremy Shockey
Pros- Plays in a pass happy offense. Redzone threat.

Cons- Is always nicked up. Will probably have more blocking responsibilities then anyone in the top 5 other then crumpler.

4. Todd Heap
Pros- Finally has a reliable QB to throw the ball to him. Has been remarkably good without a good QB.

Cons- Always an injury risk.

5. Alge Crumpler
Pros- Vick's favorite target.

Cons- Has to rely on Vick throwing him the ball.

Best of the Rest:
6. Chris Cooley- Al Saunders utilizes the TE a good deal. Cooley was already very good last year.
7. Jason Witten- Consistently good TE
8. Randy McMichael- Finally has a good QB throwing him the ball.
9. Heath Miller- Good TE. Run-first offense.
10. LJ Smith- Reggie Brown might be McNabb's only other reliable receiver.
11. Ben Watson- Brady loves to throw to those TEs and Watson is clearly the best one.
12. Vernon Davis- Who else is alex smith going to throw to? Plus he IS a freak.

Kickers:
1. Adam Vinatieri- Game's best reality kicker now plays on NFL's best offense.
2. Neil Rackers- Will defenitely get alot of opportunities. Strong leg.
3. Jason Elam- Has always been an extremly reliable kicker.
4. Jay Feely- will get alot of opportunities with that great offense.
5. Mike Vanderjagt- Has the cowboys finally solved their kicking problems?
6. Shayne Graham- Had a really good year last year. Offense is still kinda weak.
7. Jeff Wilkins
8. John Kasay
9. Josh Brown
10. Matt Stover

Defense:
1. Chicago Bears- Stingiest defense in the nfl plays in the worst division. pretty easy pick.
2. Pittsburgh Steelers- Blitzing scheme accumulates sacks and causes turnovers.
3. Carolina Panthers- That defensive line gets alot of sacks. that means lots of points.
4. Indy colts- Freeney and a suprising amount of turnovers.
5. Tampa Bay Bucs- A good all around defensive unit.
6. Seattle Seahawks- Defense actually improved over last year.
7. Baltimore Ravens- Always a sound unit to pick in the later rounds.
8. Jacksonville Jaguars- Very stingy unit.
9. New York Giants- Should accumulate alot of sacks.
10. Washington Redskins- Gregg Williams' defenses always play well.

Episode 11: Popa's Baseball First Half Report

Popa is back with an all new blog filled with goodies for people of all shapes, sizes, and ages! Today I will go through what I feel should be the awards of the first half of the baseball season. SO HOLLA AND TAKE A LOOK NUKKA

Popa's AL All Star Rosters:

Starting Lineup:

C- Joe Mauer, Min
1B- David Ortiz, Bos
2B- Tadahito Iguchi, CWS
3B- Alex Rodriguez, NYY
SS- Derek Jeter, NYY
OF- Ichiro Suzuki, Sea
OF- Jermaine Dye, CWS
OF- Manny Ramierez, Bos
SP- Francisco Liriano, Min

Bench:

C-Victor Martinez, Cle
1B- Travis Hafner, Cle
1B- Jim Thome, CWS
SS- Michael Young, Tex
SS- Miguel Tejada, Bal
3B- Troy Glaus, Tor
OF- Carl Crawford, TB
OF- Vladimir Guerrero, Ana
OF- Vernon Wells, Tor
OF- Magglio Ordonez, Det

SP- Johan Santana, Min
SP- Jose Contreras, CWS
SP- Justin Verlander, Det
SP- Roy Halladay, Tor
SP- Scott Kazmir, TB
SP- Jeremy Bonderman, Det
SP- Curt Schilling, Bos
SP- Barry Zito, Oak
RP- Jon Papelbon, Bos
RP- Mariano Rivera, NYY
RP- BJ Ryan, Tor
RP- Bobby Jenks, CWS
RP- Joe Nathan, Min

Comments:

It is tough as hell leaving off players like Paul Konerko, Francisco Rodriguez, Raul Ibanez, Mike Mussina, Ramon Hernandez, and, to a lesser degree, Pudge. It just shows you how stacked the Junior Circuit is. Every team is represented except Kansas City and I'm sure no one feels bad about that. Let's face it, KC is where baseball players go to rot away and die. If any of my friends had players from KC on their fantasy rosters, I'd make fun of them mercilessly. Mark Redman? BWAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAH, worst rule ever. I know KC got a couple of players coming up in Alex Gordon and Butler who are supposed to be pretty good hitters but who are we kidding? Kansas City is officially just a football town. What's up with this talk of Gary Matthews being an All Star or even an MVP candidate?!?!?! Matthews is a good player but is every analyst on Baseball tonight and SI on LSD and didn't tell anyone yet? ITS GARY MATTHEWS JUNIOR GUYS!!!!! JUST WANTED TO LET YOU IN ON THAT LITTLE FACT!!!! BTW, There are no second basemen in the American League.

Popa's NL ALL Star Rosters:

Starting Lineup:

C-Johnny Estrada, Ari
1B- Albert Pujols, STL
2B- Chase Utley, Phi
3B- David Wright, NYM
SS- Jose Reyes, NYM
OF- Carlos Lee, Mil
OF- Carlos Beltran, NYM
OF- Alfonso Soriano, Was
SP- Brandon Webb, Ari

Bench:

C- Brian McCann, Atl
1B- Ryan Howard, Phi
1B/OF- Lance Berkman, Hou
2B- Dan Uggla, Fla
3B- Miguel Cabrera, Fla
3B- Scott Rolen, STL
OF- Jason Bay, Pitt
OF- Matt Holliday, Col
OF- Andruw Jones, Atl
Utility- Nomar Garciaparra, LAD

SP- Jason Schmidt, SF
SP- Pedro Martinez, NYM
SP- Tom Glavine, NYM
SP- Carlos Zambrano, CHC
SP- Brad Penny, LAD
SP- Bronson Arroyo, Cin
SP- Chris Capuano, Mil
SP- Chris Carpenter, STL
RP- Billy Wagner, NYM
RP- Trevor Hoffman, SD
RP- Tom Gordon, PHI
RP- Jason Isringhausen, STL
RP- Brian Fuentes, Col

Comments: The NL talent pool is depleted. I had a surplus of players that were All Star caliber in the AL. I had trouble finding players to fill my all star roster in the NL. WTF AT THESE NL CATCHERS?!?! They can't be serious. I was forced to put Izzy and Fuentes on the all star roster. They are solid closers but does anyone actually feel that they played like All Stars this year? Look at the AL bench compared to the NL bench. Not even a contest. The pitching in the NL isn't even that deep. Look at the castoffs from the AL who are no pitching in the NL and are now conisdered aces. Arroyo. Chris Young. They are going to make themselves alot of money just because they are pitching in a suckier league. Now look at guys like Beckett and Pavano from last year. Let me remind everyone that i've been saying that the AL was the better league by far since the beginning of the year. Peep my baseball preview for further evidence.

AL Comeback Player of the Year- Jim Thome, CWS

Comments: Not even a contest here. Who in the AL has come back stronger then Toemay? Curt Schilling? Probably but I'd still vote for Thome confidently over Schilling.

NL Comeback Player of the Year- Carlos Beltran, NYM

Comments: Nomar could easily get anyones vote here. However, no one expected anything from Nomar. Not only did no one expect anything from Beltran but fans booed him mercilessly at the beginning of the year. It was almost at "A-rod at yankee stadium after he ends an inning with a double play with a runner on third" levels. He came back in a pressure packed situation. That earns him a few more points imo.

AL Manager of the Year-
1. Jim Leyland, Det
2. Joe Torre, NYY
3. Ozzie Guillen, CWS

Comments: I didn't think Torre would have a better job managing a team then last year but he's topped that so far this year. However, Leyland has one upped him. He seems to be pushing all the right buttons in Detroit right now. Gotta hand it to him. Dude's been out of baseball for a couple years and didn't seem to miss a beat.

NL Manager of the Year-
1. Willie Randolph, NYM
2. Clint Hurdle, Col
3. Grady Little, LAD

Comments: Everything Randolph is doing seems to work out. Plugging in Jose Valentin (are you fucking kidding me? When is this guy gonna start to strike out every other at bat?) at second, and even subbing in endy chavez and chris woodward in certain games. I don't have a single clue how Hurdle is keeping his team over .500 and in the NL West race. He deserves some props for this here. It's funny seeing Grady Little's name in a Manager of the Year discussion. Isn't it even funnier that he's still managing Nomar and Derek Lowe?

AL Rookie of the Year-
1. Francisco Liriano, Min
2. Jonathan Papelbon, Bos
3. Justin Verlander, Det
4. Kenji Johjima, Sea
5. Jered Weaver, Ana

Preaseason pick for AL ROY- Francisco Liriano

Comments: Paps and Liriano can easily be flip flopped. I went with Liriano. Paps is showing signs of getting hit lately while Liri has STILL looked dominant. The back end of the contenders are all very good players with good futures. Except for maybe Johjima. I think he's something like 31. Ian Kinsler deserves an honorable mention. He's been playing fairly solid for texas at second base.

NL Rookie of the Year-
1. Dan Uggla, Fla
2. Prince Fielder, Mil
3. Josh Johnson, Fla
4. Ryan Zimmerman, Was
5. Hanley Ramirez, Fla

Preaseason pick for NL ROY- Prince Fielder

Comments: Uggla has come out of nowhere and has become arguably one of the better second basemen in the league right now. He is putting up Bret Boone numbers right now. Not bad. I still think when all is said and done, Prince will end up taking this award at the end of the year however. Florida is chock full of young talent. At the end of the year, the Marlin rookies will all take votes away from each other.

AL Cy Young:
1. Francisco Liriano, Min
2. Jonathan Papelbon, Bos
3. Johan Santana, Min
4. Roy Halladay, Tor
5. BJ Ryan, Tor

Preaseason pick for AL Cy Young- Johan Santana

Comments: The top two look eerily familiar to my AL ROY top two. They were both defenitely the best two pitchers in the AL during the first half of the season. However, don't dismiss what BJ ryan has been doing in Toronto. If there was no Paps, we'd all probably be salivating over BJ (should i No homo this?).

NL CY Young:
1. Brandon Webb, Ari
2. Bronson Arroyo, Cin
3. Pedro Martinez, NYM
4. Jason Schmidt, SF
5. Trevor Hoffman, SD

Preaseason pick for NL Cy Young- Roy Oswalt

Comments: Webb has pitched lights out so far. Easily winning this first half award. Alot of people seem to hate on Trevor Hoffman but he's been fucking stellar so far this year.

AL MVP:
1. David Ortiz, Bos
2. Derek Jeter, NYY
3. Jim Thome, CWS
4. Vernon Wells, Tor
5. Jon Papelbon, Bos

Preaseason pick for AL MVP- Derek Jeter

Comments: I hate picking DHs for MVP but Ortiz is having a monster year. Again. Big Papi is the scariest left handed hitter in baseball. Bar none. Disgusting. Jeter (even though many of you hate him) has been leading the patchwork yankees through a difficult stretch.

NL MVP:
1. Albert Pujols, STL
2. David Wright, NYM
3. Lance Berkman, Hou
4. Carlos Lee, Mil
5. Carlos Beltran, NYM

Preaseason Pick for NL MVP- David Wright

Comments: As much as I want to give Wright the first half award, Pujols has been more important to his team then David Wright has. Albert was on a Ruthian pace at the beginning of the year too. Don't be suprised if he goes back on a similar tear once he's gotten back to the swing of things. Berkman has BEEN the offense for the Astros. So has Carlos Lee. At the end of the year, Beltran might be the reason why Wright doesn't win MVP. They'll both share some votes.

Episode 10: An Athlete named Andrea?!?!?

The NBA draft is one of my favorite times of the year. Lots of fun especially since I know alot of these players because I watch alot of college basketball. The Euro trash usually throw a wrench in my draft analysis because I usually know nothing about them. I'll try to get my hands on some type of video from websites or whatever but that's really not enough to form a good opinion on a basketball player. Also the past couple years, it's been dissappointing since with TNT, Hubie Brown and Charles Barkley always gave the best comments on each athlete. However this year, it was suprising entertaining with the highlight being David Stern's godfather like comments after Dan Patrick tried to mock the commish. Never test, David Stern. Of course, I also always enjoy how uncomfortable Stern looks when he's announcing trades. Anyways, on to the grades.

Atlanta Hawks: C

Added:
Shelden Williams, PF-C
Solomon Jones- PF

I like Shelden Williams alot as a player....might be because he looks like redman with down syndrome. The guys a blue collar athlete who will rebound and block shots. Something the Hawks will need since they were porous on the defensive end last year. However, THEY PASSED UP A POINT GUARD AGAIN. Foye or Marcus Williams would've been good pickups here. Also, they could've easily gotten Shelden Williams anywhere from 10-14. A defenite reach. Their second round pick will be a non factor. Lightweight with a long wingspan. BOOOOOOOOOO.

Boston Celtics: C

Added:
Sebastian Telfair, PG
Theo Ratliff, PF-C
Rajon Rondo, PG
Leon Powe, PF

What Boston did makes no sense to me. None. Rondo has no jump shot and is inconsistent as hell. Sure he's a very good athlete but he doesn't seem to have the basketball skills. Plus they add Telfair to the PG rotation which already consists of Delonte West. Why? If they don't pull off another trade, none of this is any good. I still like Telfair and think he can be something good but all I can do is laugh at this Cerberus at the PG spot. Leon Powe saves Boston from an almost failing grade. I think he's a steal. Perhaps a bit undersized but the man can rebound and score with the best of them. BEAST. Could be a powe man's Elton Brand LOL LOL LOL. Sorry, had to do it.

Charlotte Bobcats: B+

Added:
Adam Morrison, SF
Ryan Hollins, C

Bobcats added what they basically needed. Someone that can put points on the board. I've been big on Adam even though he's not a great athlete. He can score from anywhere on the court, in a multitude of ways, from many different types of angles. I can defenitely see him be a consistent 20 ppg scorer in the NBA for years. Fuck Ryan Hollins. He ain't shit.

Chicago Bulls: A

Added:
Ty Thomas, PF
Thabo Sfelosha, SG-SF

Fuck the Bulls. Not only do they always swindle the Knicks, but they always make good personnel moves. Fucking pisses me off. Ty Thomas is probably the best athlete in this draft and could be scary good. Very aggressive and a best on the boards and on defense. I don't know alot about Thabo but from what I hear, he's a very good defensive prospect. You'll need him to guard players like Wade, Lebron, Michael Redd, Adam Morrison, Vince Carter, Richard Jefferson and Jamal Crawford (LOL J/K) in the Eastern Conference. Paxson is setting these guys up for the long haul. If they ever win a championship in the coming years, they NEED to send a ring to Isiah for setting them up. Knowing Isiah, he'd probably take all the credit too. Faggot.

Cleveland Cavaliers: B

Added:
Shannon Brown, SG
Daniel Gibson, PG

Flip Murray's a free agent. For most teams, they'd probably not give a shit. But he was actually good for the Cavs so they needed insurance and got a good one in Shannon Brown. SICK ATHLETE. Sick hops, extremely strong, and has a good jump shot. He also loves to play defense. He reminds me of a football player playing basketball. I mean that in a good way. I'm not a big fan of Gibson but i'm sure he'll play given the Cavs' horrid PG rotation. ERIC SNOW IS STILL ALIVE?!?!?!

Dallas Mavericks: C+

Added:
Maurice Ager, SG

Solid pickup. Dallas always drafts well (well, other then Pavel Podkolzine LOL). He can shoot and defend (see a trend with these Michigan State players?). Will be a solid role player for the Mavericks. Heard he's a big church guy. You know that'll set him up for more minutes in Avery "YOU NEED JESUS" Johnson's rotation.

Denver Nuggets: F

Added: Nobody

JESUS CHRIST DO SOMETHING FAGGOTS. YOU DO REALIZE THAT YOU NEED A SHOOTER AND SOMEONE TO TAKE THE SCORING BURDEN OFF CARMELO, RIGHT?!?!

Detroit Pistons: F

Added:
Cheik Samb, C
Will Blalock, PG

The Pistons haven't had a single good pick since Tayshaun Prince. Joe Dumars is making money and fame off moves he made 2-3 years ago. If Paxson or Colangelo was the GM of Detroit, they probably would've had one more trophy on their mantle. OVERRATED GM. However, this is coming from a Knicks fan so take that with a grain of salt.

Golden State Warriors: F

Added:
Patrick O'Bryant, C
Some guy from Serbia, C

WOW THE WARRIORS DRAFTED ANOTHER CENTER ALONG WITH GREAT PICKS LIKE ERICK DAMPIER, ADONAL FOYLE, AND ANDRES BIEDRINS. Sooner or later, you have to see that you have a bad track record at drafting a certain position so you'll go another route. NO NOT THE GOLDEN STATE WARRIORS. WHEN AT FIRST YOU DONT SUCEED, TRY TRY AGAIN.

Houston Rockets: F

Added:
Shane Battier, SF
Steve Novak, PF-C
Lior Eliyahu, SF

The Rockets trade a potential all star for a role player. CAN SOMEONE GIVE ME A CHANCE TO BE A NBA GM? Jesus christ. I've always said, whenever you are given a chance, draft a UCONN player because you won't be dissappointed. The past few years, I've been proven right. Even when people thought Villanueva was a bad pick. Calhoun's system rarely caters to great individual seasons and Gay played on a star studded team last year. Battier isn't bad but Gay could be so much more (NO HOMO). Novak could turn out to be a nice little role player. A Brad Lohaus type. Eliyahu is from Israel. That alone gave the Rockets a failing grade. But trust me, they probably would've failed even if they didn't draft a Jew.

Indiana Pacers: F

Added:
Shawne Williams, SF-PF
James White, SG

Another failure. This time it's not who the team picked but who the team passed up. This team's starting point guard is Anthony Johnson and they pass up Marcus Williams?!?! AM I IN RETARDO NBA?!?!? THATS RIGHT NOT BIZZARO BUT RETARDO. Shawne Williams can turn out to be a decent prospect but this team is ready to compete now and Shawne Williams isn't ready now. Marcus could've helped this team alot next season. Leave it to Larry Bird to fall in love with a SF that loves to shoot threes. DID SOMEONE FORGET TO TELL HIM THAT SHAWNE IS WHITE?!?!?!

LA Clippers: B-

Added:
Paul Davis, C
Guillermo Diaz, PG

I thought Davis was unfairly hated on in college. The man always competed and played solid. 7 foot big men with nice jumpers are hard to come around. He'll be a good backup center for a while. Don't know much about Diaz but from what I hear, he is a prospect that alot of teams wanted to get their hands on. Never thought I'd be propping Elgin Baylor as a GM. One crazy year, huh?

LA Lakers: F

Added:
Jordan Farmar, PG
Danilo Pinnock, SG

Don't like Farmar and I don't know much about Pinnock other then the fact that he has a funny name. Right now Kobe is thinking "Good, two more players I don't have to pass the ball!"

THATS RIGHT KOBE!! WELL UNLESS ITS GAME 7 OF A CRUCIAL PLAYOFF SERIES AND YOU DONT FEEL LIKE PLAYING ANYMORE!

Memphis Grizzlies: A

Added:
Rudy Gay, SF
Stromile Swift, PF
Kyle Lowry, PG
Alexander Johnson, PF

The Logo came through with an awesome draft. Rudy Gay has the potential to be the best player from this draft. The only player with real superstar ability. He just has to prove it (not exactly the words you want to hear as a Memphis fan). Memphis was hurting at PG last year and they get a solid one in Lowry. Stromile Swift and Johnson will provide good PF depth behind Gasol and can probably play alongside him.

Miami Heat: A

Added:
THE SOUL OF EVERY REFEREE IN WADE'S BACK POCKET

What? Dwyane Wade wants to take Esther Baxter out to dinner? Does she wear a zebra shirt and a whistle around her neck?

Milwaukee Bucks: C+

Added:
David Noel, SF
Damir Markota, PF

I was suprised Noel didn't get picked until midway in the second round. I liked him alot. He's extremely strong for a swingman and he's a very good defensive player. Could turn out to be a solid role player in the NBA.

Minnesota T-wolves: B

Added:
Randy Foye, PG-SG
Craig Smith, PF
Loukas Mavrokefalidis, C

Foye is an excellent pick. I compared him to a poor man's gilbert arenas. Greg Anthony had a spot on comparison of Chauncey Billups. Could be a great combo guard for the T-wolves. Not a big fan of Craig Smith. He had a good college game that I dont think will translate in the NBA. Only 2 good things have come out of Greece. Gyros and hot women. Loukas should just entertain people everywhere and change his name to Loco and pick up a hispanic accent.

New Jersey Nets: A

Added:
Marcus Williams, PG
Josh Boone, PF-C
Hassan Adams, SG

Rod Thorn is a top 5 GM in the NBA. Up there with Paxson, RC Buford, Jerry Colangelo, and Jerry West. And he followed my "Pick UCONN players, trust me, you won't regret it" plan to a T. Marcus Williams was the best pure PG in this draft. He should've probably been picked 15 picks earlier. A true playmaker with clutch ability doesn't come by often. Now he gets to learn the game from Jason Kidd and adds more to the Nets attack. Josh Boone is perfect for the Nets. He rebounds and plays defense extremely well. That's what the Nets need most. He'll play significant minutes from the outset off the bench and in a couple years, could start for them. I was very high on Boone before the draft. Another sure thing in NBA drafts is selecting players from Arizona. Adams is an amazing athlete. Reminds me alot of Q-rich before he became a 3 point chucker. Great rebounder from the SG position and can create his own shot. Projects to be a very good defender in the NBA.

New Orleans Hornets: B+

Added:
Hilton Armstrong, C
Cedric Simmons, PF
Marcus Vinicius Vieira de Souza, SF

The Hornets needed frontcourt help and they got some in this draft to help out PJ Brown. Hilton Armstrong's a very good defensive player and rebounder. His offense leaves a little to be desired though. Playing with Paul will open things up for him offensively. Simmons can turn out to be a Stromile Swift type player in the NBA.

New York Knicks: F-

Added:
Renaldo Balkman, SG-SF
Mardy Collins, SG-PG

I am now officially on suicide watch. SUICIDE BOMBER WATCH THAT IS!!!!!!!

Orlando Magic: B-

Added:
JJ Redick, SG
James Augustine, PF

DARKOS GONNA BE DRAWING THOSE DOUBLE TEAMS, JJ. GET READY TO SHOOT, MAYNE

Philly 76ers: B-

Added:
Rodney Carney, SF
Bobby Jones, SF
Some guy from Bosnia, C. No, i'm not making this stuff up.

Carney is probably the best athlete in this draft and can shoot the rock pretty well. One small problem. ANDRE IGUODALA PLAYS HIS POSITION.

Phoenix Suns: D

Added:
A future first round pick from the Boston Celtics.

Wow, that was no fun.

Portland Trailblazers: B

Added:
LaMarcus Aldridge, PF
Brandon Roy, SG
Sergio Rodriguez, PG
Raef Lafrentz, PF-C
Joel Freeland, PF

Ummmm, made enough trades guys? I like the Roy and Rodriguez picks alot. Roy especially. Him and Morrison were the most NBA ready players in the draft. Roy can do everything. And the talk of Sergio being an European Streetballer can only mean good things in terms of entertainment value (in a good and bad way). Aldridge is a nice player but I don't see him being more then a 17-18 ppg scorer in the NBA, if he's that at all. I don't know much about freeland. Two bad things to come out of this draft for the Portland Trailblazers. They had to pick up Raef Lafrentz' contract. Also, they didn't draft any convicts. The fanbase will be terribly dissappointed.

Sacramento Kings: C+

Added:
Quincy Douby, PG-SG

Douby is a pure combo guard. Mainly a scoring guard though. He can shoot from anywhere in the gym. Not much of a playmaker though. Plus his name sounds like drug paraphenelia. You know Ron Artest is smiling somewhere. The guy's playing with Powder (aka Mike Bibby) and Douby.

San Antonio Spurs: F

Added:
ABSOLUTELY FUCKING NOTHING

C'mon, RC. DO SOMETHING. AT LEAST DROP YOUR LAST NAME AND TELL PEOPLE YOU'LL BE REFERRED TO AS MR. COLA FROM NOW ON. PLZ!!!!!!!!!

Seattle Supersonics: F

Added:
Mouhamed Saer Sene, C
Denham Brown, SG
Yotam Halperin, PG

Wow, they drafted a center 3 straight years. Plz refer to my Golden State Warriors comments. PLZ GUYS. Can I please be a GM in the NBA. PLEASE. The one positive out of this is they stayed true to my Uconn theory. However, they drafted an Israeli. You know what that means? A big fat F on their report card......and quite possibly some bomb threats. yeah right. Who's going to bomb Seattle?

Toronto Raptors: B

Added:
Andrea Bargnani, PF
PJ Tucker, SF

Colangelo is an outside the box GM. He went outside the box in this draft. Picked a player that could be a Dirk clone. He can crash and burn with this pick but he made a ballsy move.

Utah Jazz: B

Added:
Ronnie Brewer, SG-SF
Dee Brown, PG
Paul Millsap, PF

Ronnie Brewer's a good pick here. They needed a swingman that can get into the paint. Brewer's the man for the job. Plus he can play D and is a good playmaker from the swingman spot. Like this pick alot. They also reunited Dee Brown and Deron Williams. I like Dee Brown. Can be a bobby Jackson type off the bench. instant energy. WTF IS A MILLSAP?!?! He put up good collegiate numbers but i know almost nothing about him other then the fact that he rebounds like a beast.

Washington Wizards: F

Added:
A couple of Russians

McCarthyism came 55 years too early. Russians are infiltrating our nation's capital. DONT WORRY ABOUT THE MUSLIMS. ITS THE RUSSIANS WE NEED TO BE WORRIED ABOUT